No, no and not yet. What’s in a “no”? A deprivation, a prohibition, a denial. When we choose to say no to our children, we immediately feel a little guilty, as if we were catapulting us into the wrong.
On the other hand, resisting the whims or long snouts of our children is not always easy, on the contrary, it is a real daily battle but you must fight it with rationality and decision. Yes, depriving your child of something may initially seem to you a “bad” thing, but in the long run, you will understand that the “no” serve to the growth and the formation of your child’s character.
Children should not always be satisfied, there is nothing more wrong. In this way you are unknowingly giving them a distorted vision of life where everything is simple and easily accessible. Life is not like that, outside the home, when they have their first experiences in the outside world, they will realise all of a sudden that life can also include being said no to and you can’t always do what you want. If the child is not accustomed to it, he can remain frightened and shut himself up becoming more shy and introverted.
At school or with the first friends it is possible that disagreements and moments arise when the child receives a resounding “no” from the teacher. If the child is used to being “spoiled” he will not understand the meaning of this deprivation and he will experience it in a negative way.
When you teach your children that something cannot be done or not allowed, you are implicitly suggesting how to deal with difficult situations: asking for help. When we find a closed door in front of us, we are more inclined to find an alternative solution, to work ourselves, to stimulate creativity and, if none of these options lead to a winning solution, to ask for help.
The child who can understand when he needs an extra hand to solve a problem immediately becomes more empathetic. Empathy comes from the sense of making oneself available for the neighbour in difficulty, understanding their needs and feeling their emotions.
In short, from the too many “yes” a spoiled and senseless child can be born while with some “no” more your child will grow strong and aware of the dangers of the world and will know very well how to fight them, smiling.